Thursday, March 31, 2011

Big A's Birthday Extravaganza

As I mentioned before, Big A's birthday is on Saturday. Every year I go through exhausting efforts to make it one of the best ever (much to the dismay of my bank account and/or credit cards!). Whatever he wants, he gets. He wants to go out to dinner, we go. He wants to hang at home with his friends, we do. It's HIS birthday. He can do whatever he wants. It's his birthday week. He's not really into his birthday (or getting older), but I am, so he has to be. Haha. I just think that everyone should have their own special time during the year that is only about them. No one else. No drama. No doing things you don't want to. It's all yours. (And Big A gets this week and I get the other 51 weeks a year...haha...I kid I kid.) I was putting off buying his present because I SUCK at keeping it from him. I go through all of this crap to pick the perfect present and then I get too excited and give it to him. I bought him a small present Saturday night. I didn't get home until 1:00 AM and he was already in bed. I gave it to him Sunday night. Seriously?!?! It was less than 24 hours of seeing him. And I couldn't resist. I suck. This I know. With the impending "Nor'Easter" coming (which is Bull Shit because it is 50 degrees out and please explain to me how that creates 6-12 inches of snow) I figured I didn't want to go out tomorrow and get it. And since Big A actually has a Saturday off for once, I want to make sure that I am home for whatever he wants to do. So... I bought it on my lunch break. Aaaannnnd... I want to give it to him now. OY! I feel like I should leave it at work, but I'm afraid I will forget it. Then he will have no present. UG! Why do I have to suck so much at keeping present?!?! I just get so excited for him to go "WOW! This is awesome! The most perfect present in the entire world. Marry me tomorrow under the stars and be mine forever!" (OK, maybe not that last part, but you get my point). I just get so excited that he is excited. So happy that he is happy. And even MORE happy that I made him happy. I think I am more excited about his birthday than he is! HA! for the weekend, I am putting aside my control freak-ness and letting him decide what we do, when we do it, and who we do it with (that sounds strange, but you know what I'm getting at). I know we are going to his parents' house for Pizza, presents, and one of his mom's homemade ice cream cakes (which I am uber excited about because I LOVE his family - and no not just because I know some of them read this, (Hi Mrs. P!) they are high quality people so I LOVE spending time with them!). And I will (hopefully) be meeting my FSIL's new man who I have been DYING to meet. He needs the K stamp of approval. They all need to be good brother-in-law material or I just don't see the point in continuing seeing them. HAHA! So all in all it should shape up to be a nice little weekend. I get to spend it doing what I love best, doting all over my handsome man (well most of the time... sometimes it's all about me though ha!). Plus, I figure the more exciting I make his birthday, the more he will look forward to it, and the less he will freak out in 2 years when he turns 30...wishful thinking!

New Obsession... for like a minute

So my brother recently informed me of these adorable creatures that I never knew existed, called the Red Panda. See pictures below:

Are you done saying "Ohmygod! Those are the cutest things eeevvveeeer!"? OK. Moving on.

So what do I do upon spying these adorable creatures? Decide that I absolutely NEED to have one. Immediately thoughts of Mr. Fresh, Gerome (the petite lap giraffe...J$ and I changed the spelling from Jerome to Gerome since G is for Giraffe...gooo us!), and Benny (the Red Panda, duh!) holding hands while skipping in slow motion to a best friend soundtrack. Getting into all sorts of hi jinx, but really becoming best friends forever. I text Big A, inform him of our new family member and pass the news onto my brother. My mother and I decide that she will get one too and they will be best friends (you wonder where I get my insanity from. Hi Mom!).

My brother then responds, "no no no no no" and supplies me with this link: The Truth About Red Pandas: Stranger Fruit. Go a head and take a minute to read that. I immediately told Big A that we would not be getting Benny and that if we did he would eat Gerome, Mr. Fresh, and then the both of us.

In the attempts of proving my brother wrong, I go on Wikipedia. But don't really find anything one way or the other talking about their behavior...well in the 5 seconds I skimmed for cannibalism and such. I then come across this website: Red_Panda. Yeah I don't know what's going on with this animal, but I have decided that we are no longer getting one.

And thus explains the creation (and deflation) of my obsession for today. Questions? Comments?

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

So What Wednesday

I'm linking up with Life After I Dew again!

This week I am saying SO WHAT! if:

    • I wore sneakers to work today because my legs STILL hurt from the Jillian Michaels DVD I did two days ago... shhhhh!

    • I cleaned the house yesterday, but only the parts I didn't mind cleaning (ex: bathroom sink, toilet, and shower were NOT on that list)

    • I kind of like when I am the only one on my side of the floor at work sometimes. I enjoy listening to my I Pod and having some "me" time (don't get me wrong I love the people I work with but sometimes it is nice for it to be nice & quiet)

    • I haven't bought Big A's birthday present yet (it's on Saturday!) I suck at buying him presents and then not giving them to him right away so I'm waiting

    • The only dairy product that I will never test to see if it is still good (if you have ever drank bad milk you will become obsessed with checking too) in my house is Sour Cream because Big A and I go through it so quick it never gets bad (ewww?)

    • I get annoyed when the phone rings at work and I have to stop my music to answer it

    • I point out every little detail around the house to Big A of what I did cleaning and when he thanks me or says I did a good job, I act like it's no big deal

So that's my over-explained list for this week. What are you saying SO WHAT! to?

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

I'm not a wife but...

OK, so I know I already posted today, but I came across this on another blog (with the opinion of the woman who posted it, who is a stay at home Mother and still finds it nuts!) and HAD to comment: This is "The Good Wife's Guide". It is "10 steps to a good marriage" found in a 1950's home economics book: (Here's the link: This is what it says. I've added MY comments below each one. I know that I'm not a wife. But living with Big A is pretty much the same thing (minus the diamonds, vows, and party heh). Like I've said before, I'm a House Wife without the glitz or glamour!

1. Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready on time. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal is part of the warm welcome needed.

Ya… I do all the cooking. ALL the time. Big A has just learned how to preheat the oven and “cook” some frozen foods, but that’s about it. So this one is kinda reality. However. If I’m tired, or don’t feel like cooking, or haven’t gotten around to it yet…then tough luck. My main priority when I get home from work is not to slave over a hot stove so my man can feel that I am concerned about his needs.

2. Prepare yourself. Take fifteen minutes to rest so that you are refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking. He has just been with a lot of work weary people. Be a little gay and a little more interesting. His boring day may need a lift.

HA! Good one! Big A is lucky if I EVER wear make-up. Big work events, some weekends if we go out, holidays, etc. That’s about it. As for a bow in my hair, that hasn’t happened for the better part of 20 years. Plus, I’m tired at the end of my day. I would LOVE to rest for 15 minutes, but not to be “gay and interesting” for Big A.

3. Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house. Gather up books, toys and newspapers. Dust the tables so that they appear clean. Your husband will feel that he has reached his haven and rest and order. Doing this for him will give you a lift also.

Umm…ya. No. There is no way that I am running around the house like a crazy person just to make sure that the house isn’t cluttered for Big A. I like a clean house, but on my own terms. No one runs around the house before I get home and makes sure it is clutter-free (no matter how many times I’ve tried to get Mr. Fresh to do it!)

4. Prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash their faces and hands. Comb their hair and change their clothes if it is necessary to make them look presentable to him. They are "God's creatures" and your husband would like to see them playing their part.

We have no children. And Mr. Fresh isn’t going to let me brush his hair and fix him up every day. And no, this will not be happening when we do have kids. Moving on…

5. Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all the noises of the washer, dryer, dishwasher and vacuum. You've had plenty of time to do these things during the day. Don't do them now. Encourage your children to be quiet.

We don’t have a washer, dryer, or dishwasher, and I don’t vacuum often. Problem solved. Look I do one! I’m a good house wife! And yes, I do have a lot of free time during the day to get this stuff done, it would be my own fault…yeaaahhhh….

6. Be happy to see your husband. Greet him with a warm smile. Do not greet your husband with problems or complaints. Don't complain when he is late for dinner. Count this as minor when compared to what he had to go through all day.

For the most part I am happy to see Big A (look 2! I’m PERFECT!) except when A) we are fighting B) he is late coming home without calling C) I’ve had a bad day and then I don’t even want to see Ed McMann with a million dollar check!

7. Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or suggest that he lie down a few minutes in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him. Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soft, soothing and pleasant voice. Allow him to relax and unwind.

How about this? Since I am the one who cooks, cleans, does the laundry, grocery shops, etc. then how about when I get home he gets me a drink and encourages me to relax. Regardless…I’m not going anywhere near his feet. YUCK! I hate feet! If he wants his shoes off then the last time I checked he still had two hands!

8. Listen to him. You may have a dozen things to tell him but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him speak first. Make the evening his. He is special!

I’m special too damnit! I do listen to Big A talk about his day. And he listens to me about mine. And I’m not the type to just shut up to “make the evening his”

9. Never complain that he does not take you out to dinner or to other pleasant entertainment. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure, his need to unwind and relax. Remember that you relaxed all day waiting for his return. Now it's his turn to enjoy what you enjoyed.

I don’t complain. Big A is actually pretty good at taking me out to dinner and such. He considers it his way of paying me back for everything else I do around the house. No complaints here. Makes me feel like a “kept” woman haha!

10. The goal: Try to make his home a place of peace and order, a place where your husband can relax in body and spirit.

There is no peace and order. I’m a whirlwind. A Merry-go-Round if you will. I’m a freaking circus for christ’s sake! That’s life. Live with it or don’t live with me. End of story. So far Big A digs it (most of the time) so I’m just going to go ahead and ignore this one!

Jillian Michaels and the Forever Aching Legs

So if any of you have ever seen this:

You can imagine how I feel today.

UG! So, I decided that the wonderful kickboxing video I was doing on Exercise TV just wasn't cutting it. It was fun, but I wasn't really feeling anything afterwards. I figured, no pain no gain (or loss) right?

So I toddled my way over to Walmart yesterday to get myself a new kickboxing DVD. I was uber sad to find out that they didn't have one. What the hell was I supposed to do now?

I remembered L talking about this new(ish?) Jillian Michaels DVD that she was doing and she LOVED it! Besides the fact that L is a complete health freak and actually enjoys working out (God I wish I had her devotion and motivation) I figured that if she was suggesting it to me then she thought it was a good one. L knows how much of a wimp I am, so if she was pushing something it meant that I wasn't going to collapse from a heart attack 5 minutes in.

So, I buy the damn movie and head back to work. When quitting time came, I skipped on home so excited to do my new video. I thought, "Wow, this is going to be great! I'm going to love it. And I am going to feel great! And I am going to lose a million pounds and Jillian Michaels will be jealous of MY body!" Yeeaaaahhhh....

I did the video. I LOVED the video. I made it more than half of the way through before I was actually breathing heavy. I felt great doing it. There was only one part of it that I struggled with ( do a million jump-squat moves while rotating in a circle...have fun!) but, I even still did most of that part. Just skipped a couple (I swear!). And right when I was getting really tired, Jillian spoke the magic words "Cool down".

I had made it through. I went through the cool down moves. Stretching my muscles. Feeling great. Feeling like I accomplished something. And it ended sitting cross-legged on the floor while Jillian told me I did a great job (Thanks J! I know!) I shut the DVD off. Watched TV for about 5 minutes and then decided to get up and wash those dreaded dishes. And then I realized...

Jillian ain't no fool. She doesn't do work outs where you get a little out of breath and then chill out and are fine (especially when you are as out of shape as I am). I should have known. I should have assumed. Because I could barely get my ass off the ground. I struggled to get up while I wondered when someone had the time to replace my muscles with Jello-O without me knowing. OY! Was it bad. Well so I thought...

This morning, I woke up to what Jillian was REALLY going for. Oh am I sore! I'm doing this great, sexy walk that is somewhere between a penguin and umm...another animal that walks funny. UG! I should have know. Silly me.

So now, I am trying to keep moving so that my muscles don't go on strike. Thinking of a thousand different excuses of WHY I can't do it again tonight... (because it isn't pathetic enough to try to think up excuses to tell someone else...I need to figure out ways to lie to myself...GOOOO ME!) But, I will just have to suck it up and do it. Apparently, working out once in a blue moon really doesn't have much affect on your body...go figure.

This continues mine and Jillians love-hate relationship. She loves to make me miserable and I hate her for doing it! But the woman does have a rockin' body, so I guess I should listen to her. Although, I'm thinking a cheeseburger diet sounds more up my alley. UG!

Anyone else have any workout horror stories that they would like to share with me so I don't feel so bad and pathetic? I mean seriously, you should see me walking... it's not pretty.

Friday, March 25, 2011

Stolen Office Supplies

Every so often (as one would expect in a large office building) stuff from my desk goes missing.

The first time it happened, it was one of the plants in the plant box on the side of my desk. I had barely been at this job for a month and someone took my plant. I didn't buy the plant. It is part of the companies way of trying to make people forget that they are stuck in an office building with no windows and no connection to the outside world. (Is it snowing? Sunny? Warm? Cold? We have a skylight next to our desks, but it doesn't do much to tell us the weather outside)

Regardless of the fact that the plant was no more mine than anyone else's I took it personally. Here I was "the new kid" and the office was "a buzz" about there being a new person because A) most of the people who work here have been here for 25 years and B) Everyone is a good 15-20 years older than me at EVERYONE knew about me. Who I was. Who I worked for. And where I sat. So, the plant stealer had to have known that when they were stealing that plant, that it belonged to me. It was a personal attack. I was sad. Silly I know.

The wonderful Plant Lady brought me a new one the next week and all was well in the world. No one has stolen another plant (which may or may not have to do with the electrical fence I put around them).

However, as time goes on things disappear. It happens. Someone borrows a pen and forgets to bring it back. Which is why I have learned to have a crappy pen collection that I let people borrow and a good pen collection that I hide in a travel mug on my desk. Someone borrows your tape dispenser and leaves it where they were using it. It happens.

SO….when I noticed that my stapler had disappeared I was mildly annoyed that someone was touching things on my desk without asking, but it was ugly and gray and I didn’t really care too much. Miss. Sass was at a different location yesterday so I just used hers. I completely forgot all about it since ours look the same.

This morning she starts talking about someone stealing her stapler and I immediately had to come clean that this time, I was indeed the office supplies thief. Rather than going back and forth with the stapler, like we do with the master key to the Executive offices, I decided just to order myself another one. A pink one of course. I figured that I needed to order something that no one else had so I would know when it was stolen and who did it.

I realized that since I would now have a pink stapler that I would need a new tape dispenser since they would no longer match. That’s where this little number comes in:

Amazing right? I know. I couldn’t resist.

So, I hit “Check out” and submitted my order feeling incredibly proud of myself. I printed out the receipt and filed it for my PCard statement.

That was when I decided that I needed something out of the top drawer of my desk. I don’t remember what because I forgot as soon as I opened the drawer. Guess what I found?


After I had been looking for it for two days. I find it in my damn drawer.


It was pretty upsetting to find out that I was the office supplies thief. I mean how many people set out in a criminal investigation only to find out that they are in fact the criminal themselves. Never saw that one coming. Maybe I should write a book. The Case of the Missing Stapler. Although you all know the ending now. Will you still act surprised when you read it? Thanks! It could be a whole series even...I could write about the plant, my purple pen etc. There is no end to the material I have for my new office-mysteries series!

It’s Friday and it is quite obvious that I need it to be 4:30 PM because obviously I am struggling to get through this week! Haha! I blame it on the lack of sleep. For whatever reason the amount of sleep that I am getting is just NOT enough. Although I thought I was doing better with going to bed earlier. I really am trying to convince my body that it is not a 400 lb 60 year old man, but in fact a no-I-am-not-telling-you-how-much-I-weigh lb 25 year old woman. It’s not getting message though. UG! I think I just need some warm weather and some sunshine. That should do the trick.

Eh, whatever your plans are for this weekend I hope that they are merry and bright. I’m still working on the whole Petite Lap Giraffe situation (who I have already named Jerome). Big A and I have been discussing what type of behavior will and won’t be appropriate when Jerome comes to live with us. Big A has been practicing his inside voice as to not spook the little guy! Haha! He deals with my insanity so well!

Adios all and have a fabulous weekend! (Although we all know that I will probably get bored and be back in like… two hours…but at least before the weekend is over haha)

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Petite Lap Giraffe

So, I have become obsessed with those new DirectTV commercials with the mini giraffes. So much to the point that when they recently came out with a new one Big A was screaming bloody murder for me to come see it and paused the TV until I came into the room (Didn't I tell you we were meant to be?)

Do you know the one I am talking about? Check out the pic below:

And you can see the commercial here: DirectTV Giraffe Commercial when we are both "hard at work" my mom sends me this website:
And it got me pretty excited! Who knows if it is real and frankly, at this point I don't care. It gives me a glimmer of hope that they do indeed exist. Big A said that if I can find one for $400 or less then I can get one. I don't think he knows who he is messing with here. We know I am a bargain shopper and my skills do not stop at mini giraffes.
The first thing I did (after screaming and jumping up and down at my desk - which for some reason doesn't surprise anyone anymore) is text Big A. It went a little something like this:
ME: Holy Shit! Little mini giraffes exist! For real! I waaaaant one! (Sidenote: Yes of course I texted him before researching it futher, they have a giraffe cam for pete's sake. C'MON!)
Big A: Haha. That's mint. How much are they? (He has learned not to question where I get my information. It is easier for him to just roll with it)
ME: Haha I don't know if it is a scam. Supposedly there is this one place in Russia that has them and the next baby is promised to some Prince. I will never get one. Wah!
Big A: That's crazy.
ME: I think Mr. Fresh wants one for his birthday. (I am Mr. Fresh's translator. And since I would have a harder time convincing Big A that he wants one for his bday in April, I figured I could swing it for Mr. Fresh's in May - And yes, we celebrate our dog's birthday!)
Big A: He might eat it.
ME: Nooo they will be best friends!
Big A: Maybe.
ME: Pessimist. :)
So, I don't really know where Big A actually stands on his opinion of whether we should get a mini giraffe (since he won't even let me get another dog!) BUT, I'm pretty excited that he at least humored me with the conversation. I think it purely is because he doubts my ability to find one. I will genetically engineer myself one if I have to. Watch out Big A! Haha!
Soooo.... my new mission is to find one. Anyone have any leads on Mini Giraffes? Or Petite Lap Giraffes as the website calls them. Big A's bday is in 8 days, maybe I could surprise him?!?! Bahahaha!!!

Killer Mouthwash and a Weenie Body

OK, so I am going to admit fully that yesterday, I SUCKED!

I went home after work and since Big A has Wednesdays off he was home. I felt a bit awkward saying:

“Hey Big A, do you mind getting up and leaving for 30-45 minutes so that I can work out and then you can see JUST how out of shape I am by the insane redness of my face?”

So I just left well enough alone. We also went out to dinner. To be honest, I needed to wash the dishes in order to cook dinner and I just couldn’t be bothered. So we had a nice dinner out spending money we shouldn’t and eating food that I shouldn’t (cheese fries anyone?)

I WILL be back on track for today though. I promise. I am going to work out, wash the dishes, AND cook dinner. Gooo Super ME!

Also, I wanted to share with you an upsetting situation that I am going through. Maybe I can warn all of you and you won’t have to go through my pain.

About a week or two ago I went to the dentist for a cleaning (YUCK I KNOW!) and they suggested this mouthwash called Crest ProHealth. They said that if I used it then I should have better results when I got back for cleanings and such. I figured, “Hey why the hell not?! Anything to keep that drill away from me as much as possible”. So I tried it.

Within a day or two I had noticed that my mouth felt weird. I had also started another new toothpaste, and a different kind of toothpaste from the dentist within a few days of each other so I didn’t think anything of it. I figured I was just getting used to it and it would go away. But guess what?! IT HASN’T!

I have lost almost complete taste of EVERYTHING! PLUS, my mouth hurts and my gums are incredibly sensitive. Yesterday, I went online and figured I would start googling (PS. Spell check get with the times! “Googling” is a real term now and I DID spell it right) the different things that I am using and got a hit off the first one. THE FREAKING MOUTHWASH!!!

Apparently, there have been many complaints that people have lose their sense of taste, that it makes their mouth uber sensitive, that it stains their teeth brown. There are LAW SUITS against the company for it. Umm… why is this still on the market? And WHY are dentists recommending it? UG!

So today is my second day not using it. Everything tastes bland because I can really only taste things with the side of my tongue. Which makes drinking coffee and eating absolutely miserable (especially since it also made my teeth sensitive and hot liquids do NOT feel good at all. The smart thing to do would be to not drink coffee until it is better, but if you know me you know better)

I’m really hoping that it goes away within a couple days. I think that is has gotten a little better, but it is hard to tell because it has changed a little and I am not sure if it is better, worse, or the same. But it is HORRIBLE regardless!

I didn’t see any information on how long it took for people to go back to normal. I know that a lot of people had to pay hundreds of dollars to get their teeth cleaned, polished, whitened, etc. from the brown spots. I can notice it a little, but I think (HOPE) I caught it early enough. I’m going to do a little more research of what people are saying about how long it lasted. UG!

Sooo… if you are in the market for a new mouthwash, I would strongly recommend AGAINST Crest ProHealth. Unless you don’t really enjoy the taste of food, drinking hot liquids, or having a pain/stain free mouth. Then by all means, go for it!

UG! Why do all these crazy reactions happen to me? I have to have the most sensitive body in the entire world. My body is a wimp. It needs to toughen up and deal with this crap! SUCK IT UP! Weenie!

I’m sure I will post again later, but for now I think my mouth/mouthwash/weenie body rant is enough for you right now. Don’t you agree?

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

So What Wednesday

This week I am trying something a little new. I'm a HUGE fan of Life After I Dew and have decided to join her for So What! Wednesday.
I'm saying So What! if...
  • My house is not the cleanest thing in the world. I do my best to stay on top of things, but at the end of the day I would rather be spending time with Big A and Mr. Fresh than cleaning
  • I broke my OWN "No Take-out Rule" last night. I was craving a salad (which may be a sign of the end of the world) and decided to roll with it
  • I wear the same clothes to work week after week after week. I am convinced that their is some alien living inside my body making it gross and I refuse to buy new clothes until they are small and cute
  • I was late to work this morning because I forgot to put water in the coffee maker and there was NO coffee. I think my coworkers would rather I am 10 minutes late than show up without coffee
  • Wine night with my ladies may or may not be getting me through the week. Mama needs some wine and girl talk (Even though I got plenty of that with L last night. You can never have enough wine or girl talk!)

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Goals, Goals, Goals

I completed yesterday’s goals. I’m pretty happy about it. I was crazy productive when I went home.

I managed to take the dog out, wash the dishes (twice), workout, cook lasagna, vacuum the rugs, and clean the counters…all by the time Big A got home. I was pretty impressed with myself.

Today’s goals? Workout and do a couple loads of laundry. (Since tonight is the weekly night that L comes over, I am just going to eat leftover lasagna rather than cook an entire meal that only I will be eating! Still counts!)

I’m liking this whole daily goal thing. I feel like I have to take personal responsibility for what I do. And if I don’t do it, then I feel the need to explain. And even I feel lame typing…I didn’t do what I wanted to do. Instead I sat on the couch like a fat ass, watched TV, and ordered disgusting food. Ya… I’m all set with writing that. Because honestly anything else would be a lie.

So far so good. We will see how long this lasts.

Work is going well. A little slow lately, but it usually doesn’t take long for things to pick up. Then I’m buried. I continuously need to remind myself that I am asking for it when I claim to be bored. There’s someone getting a big kick out of it. I can just see it now.

Me: “Wow. Gee Golly, I sure am bored”

Powers that be: “Really? Bored? OK… Take this!”

*Insert gigantic piles of paperwork falling from the sky and my computer bitch slapping my face to get to work since it all needs to be done yesterday*

Yep… that about sums it up.

The rest of life is pretty boring right now. Not that I am complaining at all. It’s better that the amazing amount of insanity that usually ensues. I will take this any day.

Ma Dukes and I have started a fun little thing in order to get our big butts into shape encourage a healthier lifestyle. We have set little bribes prizes for ourselves to reward us when we reach certain goals. With the nice weather right around the corner (it better be or I am going to be one pissed off Masshole) we are dying for a manicure and pedicure. We don’t go often, but when we do it is heaven. BUT we have agreed that we are not going until we lose 5 lbs.

Mine looks a little like this:

5 lbs Manicure & Pedicure
We need to wait for both of us to lose 5 lbs for this one. This will be the only one we need to reach together since we all know going alone is SOOOO boring!

10 lbs Big A bought me a gift certificate for
my birthday and I have been
waiting for the right time to use it!

15 lbs Sexy Summer Shoes. You know the kind of shoes that say "ya I'm awesome and my shoes match my awesomeness"

20 lbs A Victoria's Secret bathing suit. Apparently this one is from a few years ago (I can't believe I never saw it!) but I will get one as equally as awesome!

I’m pretty excited about it. I get to be healthy. Lose weight. AND get fun stuff that I would normally talk myself out of buying to “save money”. BUT I can rationalize these things if I feel like I deserve them.

So. We will see how it goes. It all seems like a great idea within the first two days. Then life happens and it is pretty easy to get off track. We shall see.

Anyone else have goals they are struggling to meet? Or am I the only heffer person who is having trouble achieving what they want?

Monday, March 21, 2011

Weekend Recap

This past weekend was a good one. A great one even.

Friday night was pretty mellow. I finished up L's bridal shower gift (which came out awesome! if I do say so myself. I will try to remember to post pictures later). Then I met up with Big A and we hung out for a bit. When we got home I had informed Big A that he had missed out on his cooking window and that we were getting take-out (ya, ya, ya. I know I failed my mission...but just wait!). So we had a nice dinner at home in our PJ's and watched Ghostbusters until I assed out.

Saturday was filled with some busy running around. We had L's bridal shower so I spent most of the morning running around and then meeting up with the girl to set everything up. The MOH's did a fantastic job with the stuff that they picked and they were so prepared that it made it easy for the rest of us to set everything up in time. L LOVED it which was the most important thing. The place looked amazing, the food was delicious, and she made out like a frickin' bandit when it came to the gifts. She has a great (and very generous) group of friends and family. It was nice to see everyone there for her and I am so glad she she enjoyed it!

After the shower, and when everyone had gone home and we were done cleaning up, I headed home. I met up with Big A and we decided to take out the Chevelle for it's first ride this year. This was a pretty big deal since I have never been out with him for the first ride. It's usually one of his friends. And last year I only got to ride in it a couple times so it was nice to get to go for a ride and feel a little special. We just went for a short ride and brought it home, but it was great. Made me want summer...ummmm.....NOW! Then we decided to keep things simple and just hang at home. I made dinner (See! See! Saturday wasn't in my original plan so I made up for Friday! SCORE!) and we ordered a movie off On Demand. We watched The Fighter with Mark Wahlberg and Christian Bale. It was pretty amazing. I suggest everyone goes out and watches it right NOW! AMAZING! It was nice to just hang out at home. We had some friends that were going out that we kind of ditched, but neither one of us was feeling going out. It's nice to see kind of a change in priorities. Not to mention it is good for the wallet! Since we didn't go out to eat or drink, the entire evening cost of the $4.99 for the movie!

Sunday morning, we were lazy butts and slept in. Then Big A and I went out to a nice brunch. It was delicious. He got the most amazing pancakes I think I have ever had and I ate like half of them. Haha. He always orders YUMMY food! Good thing he's a better sharer than me! Haha. After that we headed over to his parents' house. Big A took a look at his dad's Corvette (also Big A...but to keep the confusion level down...he shall be hereby known as Papa A). Papa A let us take it out for a little test drive to see what was going on with it. It was my first ride in a Corvette so it was pretty cool. But damn those things are small inside! Haha.

After the ride, we just went home and hung around like bums for awhile. We are pretty good at that. Haha. Then I headed over to Ma and Pa Duke's house for Family dinner. Ma Dukes and I cooked a delicious dinner (there may or may not have been a few issues but we did pretty good. haha).

So, all in all that was my fantastic weekend. I am going to continue to attempt to cook every night this week. Let's see how it goes. I am also going to attempt to clean at some point since my house is just BEGGING to be cleaned. It's pretty sad. Also, my goals for today is to work out and cook dinner. I feel that if I claim that I am going to do something on here... I feel like I HAVE to do it. Sooo... you get to hear my weekly and daily goals...because otherwise... I will continue to sit my fat butt on the couch and do nothing. Goooo me!

Friday, March 18, 2011

Bridal Showers, Bathing Suits, and Boredom

I can NOT believe that L's bridal shower is tomorrow. It is blowing my mind. I seriously feel like it was yesterday that she called me up to tell me that she was engaged. This is insane!

I mean, I understand that it has been almost 2 1/2 years, but think about that... it's has been 2 1/2 YEARS(!) of wedding talk. 2 1/2 years of looking at venues, wedding dresses, bridesmaid dresses, flowers, etc. etc. etc.

What the HELL am I going to do with myself after her wedding?!?!

I can't even imagine how crazy she feels right now. I almost feel like we need to start planning a second wedding for her. This has taken up the majority of our conversation for the past 2 1/2 years...what will be fill our conversations with now? (I ask this jokingly because everyone knows that L and I have NEVER had a problem finding things to talk about!)

I'm currently putting the finishing touches on one of her presents. L specifically asked me to make her this even BEFORE she was is imperative that it is perfect. I have had experience with this once before, but I was kind of a rookie with it (sorry you got the short end of the stick J$, but although it may not be my best you will always be my first! bahaha!)

I can't wait to post pictures of it because I am SO excited about how it is turning out so far! BUT in the off chance that L reads this (does she read this? Who knows? If so, HI L!!! LOVE YOU! hehe) I don't want to give it away. SOOO... hopefully next post will have the pictures and a recap from the shower. SOOOOOO EXCITED!

In other news...I am digging this beautiful weather! I understand that this will be short lived and we aren't out of the woods yet...but I'm enjoying it while it lasts. I'm not a huge fan of big winter coats and boots and mittens and scarves and freezing my ass off you can tell Winter in Massachusetts is NOT my favorite thing. I NEEEEEEEEED Spring and Summer.

I have also continued my cooking goal. Last night I made a fabulous Hamburger Helper with veggies. Not the most healthy thing in the world, but I am working on portion control...and...let's be 9 PM I ain't cooking no five course meal! (Nice English huh?) Next week starts the getting my fat ass into shape exercise portion of the plan! Here's to a Summer of not having to wait until night time (or when people are so drunk they won't remember) to get into a bathing suit. Hell... if all goes well I may just start wearing one to work just because I can (well, I can't really...they would probably be upset with me...but I wouldn't NOT be wearing it just because I was self-conscious about it! Seee! SEEEEE!)

Anyway... that's all I have to bore you with for now. I'm taking a half day today to get some stuff done and I think I am still going to have trouble making it until 12! Nothing like beautiful weather to turn you into a complete slacker who no longer feels like showing up to a job you previously loved! YAY for SPRING!

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Staff Meeting Day

Staff Meeting Day. Oh how I HATE Staff Meeting Day. Seriously. With a burning passion.

Once a month we have these staff meetings. The third Wednesday of every month. And each time, they get longer, and longer, and longer, and longer…

My favorite is when I get set-up by a false sense of hope. When the agenda says that we will finish early.

But….then EVERYONE talks for 10 times the amount of time they had originally predicted.

Today, I knew it was going to be bad. I KNEW the agenda was bad. We weren’t even going to finish until about an hour later than we normally do. THAT was wishful thinking.

By lunch time, we had only made it through half of what we were supposed to. I couldn’t take anymore. I really couldn’t.

I asked if I could do back upstairs and get some work done. I am well aware of the fact that this isn’t ideal. That I am expected to be in these meetings. That it would be good for me to soak up all of the information that I can.

But… I couldn’t do it. I figured that my boss’ disappointment would beat watching me spaz out from sitting still for too long. That probably would NOT be good for my career. But, that’s just an assumption.

I am not on my A game today either. I drank too much wine with L last night. Shocker! I wasn’t planning on it. It just happened. It usually works out that way. We had some great girl talk though. So despite the fact that I am NOT hungover (SCORE!) I’m still tired.

These are unfortunately the moments that make me still feel like a little kid. As much as I joke sometimes, it can get rather embarrassing not being able to sit in a meeting for long lengths of time. Luckily, in my position there’s a lot of things that need to get done, so I usually have an excuse to escape. But, what am I going to do when I HAVE to stay for the whole thing. It’s bad enough that everyone pretty much has kids my age…I don’t need them associating me with my tendency to be a complete spaz. Once again…not good for the career. Go Figure!

Onto bigger and better things…

Tonight I am having a wonderful ladies dinner with Lil Miss, her mama, and one of her friends. It’s going to be the Bee’s Knees. The Cat’s Meow? It will be pretty damn awesome. Big shout-out to Big A (just in case he ever decides to read this) who has graciously let me reschedule our date night two weeks in a row (travelling last week, dinner with Lil Miss) when we all know I wouldn’t be so understanding. Haha! I’m working on it!

I also have L’s Bridal Shower this Saturday. Since the cat is out of the bag (which would have been my fault…but in my defense…well…I’ve got nothing. She got it out of me. Bottom line) I can now talk about it. Well…kinda. I’m looking forward to it. I can’t believe that we are already here! And then it’s just a little over two months until the wedding. Craziness!

It going to be a long week. But, I’m looking forward to it. Planning for Ma Duke’s Nifty Fifty is in full swing so that’s exciting. AND despite the torrential downpour today, the weather is finally getting better in good old Massachusetts. Things are looking up (although purely by saying that I have just completely jinxed myself and all hell is about to break loose.)

Oh and I continued my quest last night. I was going to make my famous Chicken Marsala, BUT I ran out of time. It is delicious, but that damn meal takes FOREVER to make. So I made chicken and rice with veggies for dinner. AND I had a tuna wrap for lunch yesterday, so that was relatively healthy as well. I did, however, have an entire bottle of wine so I am sure that doesn’t help with the calories. Whatever!

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Random Ramblings

Night one.... a success!

Last night I cooked Turkey Kielbasa cooked in honey, cheddar & broccoli noodles, and a mixture of veggies (cauliflower, broccoli, and carrots, my FAVE). So, I get a big fat A for cooking dinner.

Unfortunately, I am also attempting to eat healthier so I can attempt to feel like a girl again instead of a humpback whale...Big Fat FAIL!

Although, it is all about portion control. Right? So I didn't do too bad. And at 10:30 when Big A was eating Pringles I DID.NOT.EAT.THEM! Sooo.... maybe a C+ for the day? B-?

This is where it gets tricky. I plan on cooking tonight since I should have enough time before L comes over. However... since 'Lil Miss is in town I have graciously been invited to her house for dinner. much for my plan. BUT, in all fairness... the whole point of this was to quit ordering out or going out to dinner...technically I am not doing either. LOOP HOLE!

Am I the only one who makes plans and decisions for themselves and then attempts to find a loop hole, in my own though process, to make me feel better about NOT doing it? Please someone tell me they do this just doesn't feel normal. Haha!

Anywhoodles, (HA! That one's for you MA!) last night I met one of my mom's friends to discuss her upcoming Nifty Fifty party! I can't get into details since Ma Dukes reads this often (Hi MOM!) but it is going to be pretty sweet! LOVE.IT!

Other than that, things are pretty boring around these parts. It's a slow week at work, so that means that I will be out of my skull with boredom and then a gigantic amount of work will be thrown at me and I will want to jump off a cliff. At least I am aware of the cycle!

Still in the process of finding a damn rug for the living room. I didn't think it was going to be this hard. It's ridiculous! All I want is a 6X9 foot rug, that goes with the blue couch covers, that gives me some killer accent colors, all for under $200. Is that too much to ask? Apparently. UG!

Alright, this post has just become random ramblings, so I think I shall move on until a muse hits me. You don't want to be reading this garbage and I don't want to be writing it. I'll be back with blogging GOLD later!

Monday, March 14, 2011

Weekend Recap

It was a long weekend. I am exhausted. I need a weekend to recuperate from my weekend.

Friday, I arrived home (finally) as a shell of my former self. After traveling, two days in Ohio, and traveling back (including a nice hour and a half delay sitting on the plane), I was EXHAUSTED!

Oy! I had plans to be super girlfriend and go food shopping, clean the house, and cook dinner before Big A came home. However, the fact that I was later than expected and had difficulty walking or forming full sentences…I decided it might not be the best idea.

So, I sat my lazy ass on the couch and had some QT with Mr. Fresh while I waited for Big A to come home from work. We hung out for a bit, grabbed some food, and I was asleep by 11. I know, I know. WILD!

Saturday I got my haircut and met up with Ma Dukes for a little retail therapy. All in all, I spent $13. Not too bad.

When Big A came home we went out to eat…again (ya, his girlfriend is kind of a slacker and hasn’t been cooking lately. Or cleaning. Someone needs to keep that girl in line!). After that we headed over to a friends house for a birthday party. It was a blast. They have that Kinect system for the Xbox and we played some sports games before sending the boys downstairs for us girls to play this dancing game. It was hysterical and I am madly obsessed with it (I may or may not be attempting to convince Big A that we need a Xbox). I didn’t really think much of it, but it’s a great workout. Every muscle in my body hurt!

We had so much fun. We were both kind of tired, so we figured we would go for a couple of hours and then head home. Ya…. Next thing we know it’s 1 AM. We headed home shortly after that, but with travel time, unwinding when we got home, and the clock change…it was nearly 3:30 AM by the time we went to sleep.

I haven’t been up that late in a really, really, really, really, really LONG time. We aren’t big partiers, night owls, etc. By Friday we are usually exhausted. So this was big for us. So… we did like anyone else would have done…we slept extra late on Sunday!

Unfortunately, with being the laziest people on the face of the planet sleeping in and the loss of an hour… I felt like I wasted my Sunday. I did end up going grocery shopping. I kind of figured I had to. I had this conversation with Big A:

ME: Hmmm…. I can’t decide it I want to go grocery shopping or clean the house today”

BIG A: “YOU ARE GOING GROCERY SHOPPING?!?!?!” (he asks in a loud, hopeful, excited voice)

ME: “Well, apparently I have to now since it is quite obvious that you are starving to death”

I figured when your BF gets SUPER excited about the fact that you are going to get food from the grocery store… it may mean that you are really are low on food. Haha!

So, I grumbled, and pouted, and complained to Mr. Fresh…but eventually dragged my ass to the grocery store. I had so much food in my cart you would have thought that I was buying for a family of four, or five. Since I despise going I try to buy at least 2 weeks worth of stuff at a time. It makes the amount a little more, but I usually go right after I get my paycheck and I’m sure I would be buying more junk food if I went every week. (The way it works now is I get Big A a couple things every time I go, but when they are gone they are gone. He either has to wait until I go shopping again or go get some himself. He usually ends up buying stuff I don’t like since we have different tastes in junk food, so either way I don’t end up eating it. It’s a pretty good deal)

Big A was a rock star when I got home and carried everything in. I usually go when he is still at work, so it was nice to have help for a change. He then helped organize and put everything away. It was fabulous. My normal routine is whine, shop, unload the car, sit and drink a beer/glass of wine for about an hour and then put the groceries away. So, it was nice to have someone else there to help with the grunt work and get it done quicker.

After that there was some more lazing around and then dinner/laundry at the parentals’ house. All in all good weekend. But I’m exhausted! I’m still in some muscle pain. I am well aware that I am uber out of shape, but this thing really was a great workout. Fantastic!

Also, I’ve decided that as a result of my slacker ways, I need to get back into cooking (and cleaning. YUCK!). So I am holding myself to posting every day what I cooked the night before. This way I (and you) can hold myself accountable. Since I go to my parents’ house for dinner every Sunday and I have plans Saturday that might interfere with dinner… I’m going to just shoot for Monday through Friday. Let’s see how it goes!

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Confessions of a Kid Trapped in a Grown-up's Body

OK, let’s be honest here. I figure I owe it to at least myself and those who actually read this horrid thing.

I’ve got baby fever!

There I said it.

Now, before you all go crazy thinking there is going to be a big “announcement” soon, stop right there. There won’t be. At least if I can help it.

Let me explain. I’ve always wanted kids. It has always been part of the plan. A big important part of the plan. So important that I definitely wouldn’t have dated anyone, ever, if they didn’t want kids. There wasn’t a point. Why go through the heartache of realizing 6 years later that we are on different pages? I refused to do that to myself. I also refused to believe that I could “change” someone. It wasn’t my place.

So, it’s always been hypothetical. Someday, I would become a Mother. And I’m really struggling with the whole concept that “someday” is ummm…right around the corner. Well…kinda. It’s not 10 years away anymore. It’s in the 5 year plan. And that is both equally thrilling and SCARY AS HELL!

I go back in forth between the whole thing of I want a baby (like…umm…yesterday) and holy shit, I’m just a baby myself. I can raise anyone. OH.MY.GOD!

Yep, welcome to my head. It’s a scary place. Most often…these thoughts happen within seconds of each other. Think it’s confusing? Try living with it!

But… it’s not in the plan right now. Big A and I definitely want to go down that road someday, but today (or any day within the next couple years) isn’t that day. We have a path. We will get there when we get there. No biggie.

I think the whole baby thing is really just a symbol of being an adult. That, I’m not really a kid anymore. I’m not in my “early 20’s”. I have a real job, in a corporate office. Where I am responsible and accountable for my actions. I don’t live with my parents anymore. I have rent, and bills, and chores that I have to do because Mom isn’t going to wash the dishes if I leave them there long enough. (Although I would be lying if I said my mother has never washed my dishes at my apartment. Thanks Mom!) This is real life. And for most things…”someday” is now.

And that has been hard to deal with. The overwhelming fear that what I do now actually matters. It’s a big deal. People may excuse bad behavior from a teenager, or potential employers may look over the fact that you got fired from being a receptionist at SuperCuts at the age of 15…even though you were “shockingly” replaced with the manager’s daughter. This matters. I am making a career for myself. A life. And what I do now effects the next 20 or 30 years.

At first I freaked out about this. There may or may not have been crying fits where I tried to explain to Big A what was wrong with me between being a blubbering mess and hyperventilating. But, I am becoming more comfortable with it. Becoming more comfortable in my skin. More comfortable with my life.

So will there be babies? Yes. Of course. SOMEDAY. But, with everything else going on, I’m extremely comfortable saying, “someday” for that…isn’t here yet.

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Columbus or BUST!

Guess where I am? Ya, I'm sure you figured it out. I'm in Ohio....AGAIN! UG!

This time for two "sleeps" (like how I define the length of my business trips in little kid language? too)

My boss is having a staff meeting tomorrow. He didn't expect me to come, but we have talked about this, I need to be a big kid. My career may or may not depend on it. FUN.

So here I am. This time I decided to have a little bit of fun and meet a friend of mine for dinner. As much as Columbus would never replace Boston, they have amazing restaurants. And of course what else matters to me but food.

We went to this great Irish Pub and had Fish & Chips. My Pa Dukes commented on the fact that every time I come to Ohio it's raining. And that at least I can enjoy a nice "Irish Day". Then there was a family from Ireland on my plane from Ireland. So what better way to cap off the Irish themed day then to eat Fish & Chips.

The pub was great. There was a bunch of people there. Everywhere. It was a great party bar. Not much of a sit down dinner place. The fish part of the dinner was AMAZEBALLS! However, the "chips" were some chip/french fry hybrid that I didn't much care for. And they served it with fruit. Weird. They did have my beer that I'm in love with. The Lindemanns Framboise. Ridic. All in all. The food was OK, but the company was BEST!

We shall call her Lady. She is the best. I met her last summer when we worked on a big event together. I used my three days to attempt to convince her that she needed to move to Massachusetts. I was soooooo close, but alas she decided that uprooting her family wasn't the best choice. Go figure. I see her whenever I am in Ohio and this time we decided to take advantage of some extra time I had and head out on the town. It was fabulous. Plus, she LOVES to talk about my favorite subject, Big A!!!

Alas, the night has ended and I am back in my room. ALONE!!!


Let's talk more about food, so I can further distract myself from my situation. Ug!

I had a layover in D.C. today and actually had some time to hang out between flights. Usually I am running for dear life from one plane to another. This means that I don't eat until dinner. It makes for a cranky me. However, this time I had lunch. Shocking.

I decided to try Five Guys Burgers since I had heard so much about it. Plus, I figured that if it sucked I wasn't wasting MY money. There were big signs all over the place with comments about how good they were. Then there was the creepy guy who talked to me about good they were, and how he lives in CT and they used to have one in NY and he and his friends drove there to eat them. Then he talked about how good the prices were at the airport. Then he walked away without buying anything...weird!

Whatever, anyway. So I tried them. And the result? SWEET BABY JESUS THOSE THINGS WERE FANTASTIC! Seriously?! There have been cheeseburgers out there this delicious and I haven't tried them? Saddest story ever. These things were greasy as hell, but well worth it. And I may or may not be craving one of them I am going to gain 3,000 pounds on this trip.

Alright. I'm sure you have heard enough about my thousand pounds of food that I have consumed today. More of my wonderful trip later. Night people!