Thursday, March 21, 2013

Random Late Night Post About Life

Sometimes in life it is easier to focus on all of the negative bullshit that's happening. It's easier to get caught up in everything that is going on and everything that you DON'T have, rather than to focus on the positive. I feel like it's also a catch 22. If you sit and complain all the time, then people think you are a whiner.

If you talk about how great your life is, then it can go two ways. One set of people think that you are full of yourself and bragging. You get labeled as an asshole. The other set of people think that you are lying. Trying to create this facade that life is perfect. There's a lot of that in this blogging world. People judge those who talk about the positives in life thinking they are just trying to create this false lifestyle instead of being "real". Which is kind of a joke seeing as how most people are judged the second that they talk about something real. Something that someone doesn't agree with. We see it all too much. I mean c'mon, there's an entire website dedicated to talking shit about bloggers.

I for one can see why people just want to talk about the rosy topics. Wouldn't you rather be judged for talking about mundane topics rather than something that lays heavy on your heart? People will take any chance to grab one single sentence you write in a huge blog post and perseverate on it, turning it into something ugly. It's so easy to get caught up in all of it. The bullshit. I think we have all come to realize that high school never ends. Some people never grow up. That's just life.

But maybe, just maybe there's something more going on. Those people who talk about all of these great things that are happening to them are really just trying to focus on the positive. To count their blessings in life in a world that can sometimes be so ugly and so hurtful. Why do we fault people for that? Shouldn't we applaud those who are choosing to add a little light in the world. A world that feeds off the gossip of anyone and everyone. I mean, we all love a juicy story, but we tear down those who add a little positive, constructive substance? Seems a little messed up to me.

This all came about when I was sitting in my basement just now. I was by myself, Mr.Fresh was roaming around, looking for a good stick in the wood pile to chew on and I was so glad that he had that basement. That he has that space to wander around to find just a little bit of pleasure in one of his favorite activities. I was proud that I owned a house. That I had a roof over my head. Somewhere to grow a family. To create memories. I realized that i was so incredibly happy with where my life was. I get asked all the time how married life is. How the house is. And you know what?! It's pretty fucking great.

Not to say that we don't have our problems. That we don't deal with struggles. But for the most part none of those really matter. Our lives are good. Big A and I were joking, in a morbid sort of way, that we were going to give ourselves heart attacks by stressing over stupid stuff. And even though I knew we were joking and neither one of us are at risk for going into cardiac arrest any time soon (knock on wood), I said, "yeah, maybe, but what a life it has been". And I totally meant it.

There's something so calming and freeing knowing that if something were to happen, if I died tomorrow, then I would die a happy person. I had a great life, I was in a great place. And yeah it would be a shame to have it all end so soon, but at least I can say I loved.

I feel like all too often we are reminded that life is short and uncertain. That we never know what is going to happen. My grandpa always used to say that they day you are born, the day you are supposed to die is written next to that day in a book. We are never to know what that day is until it comes, but there is nothing that we can do to change it. We get one life. So live it.

I'm not trying to be morbid or weird. I'm just trying to take this little moments in life, those days where you are reminded how good you have it, worth something. I want to go through this life knowing that I have LIVED. Really truly lived.

And today I know that's true. Today I know that life is good and I am LIVING.

That's all I'm really trying to say here. Just stop every so often and have that moment. It makes everything seem just a little bit brighter. Makes the bad hurt a little bit less. Makes the unknown just a little less scary.

I did that tonight. And it felt good.


  1. I couldnt have said this better myself! This is something that is really important to me. I've always been the type of person that tries to see the positive. My life isnt perfect, nor is anyone elses but i'd rather look at things in a positive light and be hopeful and grateful for all that I have. A perfect example of this for myself at least is the vision problem I have. This is something that poses alot of struggles but I dont look at it that way. I've had alot of friends that have turned the other way because they think that I get too much special treatment or if I say that a professor did something nice for me, they think I'm bragging and that I'm teachers pet. I dont see it that way. I've had this issue all my life and I forever will. I did a huge blog spot of it a few weeks ago. Not to make people feel sorry for me or to build myself up. It was for myself to reflect on the great parts of life I do have. I'll never get to "experience" the world you all do, but its ok. I see things in a different light because of the situation. I'm thankful to be here. I'm thankful for all that I have. I'm thankful for the help I'm able to receive. I'm thankful for all of it. I'm not saying that having a disability or something is the best. People take alot for granted instead for seeing that even if they dont have alot in their life, it's still good.

  2. I could not agree with you more. It's hard balance sharing the positives and negatives in your life because you do get accused of so much no matter what you do. Bottom line is no one is perfect - it's why I decided to share what I did yesterday. People might come to my blog and be like, oh look at her getting married with her house and dog, but there is so much more to me than that. There are dark and twisty parts, but overall I'm well adjusted and happy. That is a gift everyday.

  3. This made me laugh because it totally hit home. I am someone who ALWAYS tries to focus on the positive and be bright and cheery even in the worst circumstances. Why? Because I don't want to draw any extra attention and energy to the bad things. If you focus on the positives, you attract more positve things into your life. It's not to say that you don't have struggles or issues or hurts. We all do. I just choose not to spend my time and energy focusing on that when there are sooooo many good, happy things in my life that I can put my attention on. And I get so much crap for it all the time. Like you said, people think Im fake or full of it and Im trying to hide something. But I truly couldnt care less... because I know Im doing what is right for ME :)

  4. You are so right! I was just thinking about this the other day. I forget to do this myself sometimes. Sometimes focusing on the positive things in life is the only way that you can deal with all the other stressful crap that goes on. And I was always told to focus on the positive instead of the negative. Glad you were able to put it into words for everyone to read. Damn! Why can't I ever put something like this into words like you do? I always have these profound thoughts and then I try to sit down and write about them, and I can't get anything out.

    And there's a website for people to talk crap about bloggers? People are jack asses!

  5. Here's a positive thought: I have a really awesome daughter, who has grown into an amazing woman who has the strength and courage to say what she feels is important. So proud of you!

  6. Good post!! :)

    There is a website for bashing bloggers??!! Really?


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