Friday, April 5, 2013

Friday's Letters

 
Sweet Baby Jesus I'm so excited it is Friday.
 
Lately, I haven't been a huge fan of work, so I LIVE for the weekends.
 
Not that there's anything wrong with work, I just don't want to do it anymore. But...I still want to get paid. I asked my boss how I could do that and he just laughed at me.
 
Yeah...I wasn't kidding...
 
Anywho... time for Friday's Letters!
 
Dear Big A, sweetums, love of my life. Word to the wise, when I'm exhausted and already up for 45 minutes past when I asked if we could go to sleep (and an hour and 45 past when I really wanted to go to sleep), and it is 11:45...it is NOT the time to decide you are hysterical and tickle me when we finally shut the lights off. AND..btw...I wasn't about to cry, that was my battle call, one more second and you were about to get kicked in your man parts...smooches!
 
Dear Self, let's start with the positive. You kicked ass with your working out AND eating yesterday. I won't even judge you about the cold sweat you broke out into while you circled the wine fridge like you were a lion and it was your pray. The important part is that you drank water instead. Proud of you Boo!
 
Dear Weather Man, I saw 60's in the weekend forecast and 70 at some point next week. Don't toy with my emotions. I will hunt you down.
 
Dear Pool Lounge Chairs, I love you. I can't wait for us to be together. I just want to rip you out of that box and just look at you. So much that I almost sat on TOP of the box and pretended that we were at the pool on a hot Summer's day. BUT...I figured that I would somehow fall off and hurt myself and Big A would find me sprawled across the basement floor and I didn't want to have to explain myself.
 
Dear Mr. Fresh, it is going to take me awhile to bring you back to the dog park because last time you got sick. I know that the two probably weren't connected, but apparently I am an overly nervous Mother and that's just life. SO, do me a favor, when I bring you in the backyard to play please don't immediately pull some crazy trick and come back limping. I've had enough of your antics. Just be a normal healthy dog. Thankyouverymuch.
 
Dear Co-Workers, sorry for randomly breaking out into song all the time. Another sorry for it usually just being humming and mostly a song that I made up in my head. I know that you probably think that I am some diversity candidate for an outreach program (because I weird myself out sometimes too), but I appreciate for not treating me any different.
 
Dear Self, now comes the tough love. You are doing a good job trying to be healthy. Eating right. Working out. Proud of you. BUT, when you find a "squat challenge" and decide you are just going to bust out the days that you missed real quick, can you remember that you have the fitness level of Fat Bastard and be realistic. You barely got through day one and not sitting and standing is a problem. Maybe just go easy Deal?
 
Dear N, I appreciate that you are taking your job at Pool Guard seriously and finding all of these awesome things for the pool. I hope that we can get some of them. Just do me a favor and try not to let the power go to your head this Summer. Mmmmkay?
 
Dear Building Designers, thank you for making it so that my desk, and thus my computer, faces away from people. It makes it a lot easier to roll my eyes when they ask me stupid questions while pretending to be sweet and helpful.
 
Dear Big A, sometimes when I'm being especially snarky I remember how you said that you prefer happy cheery people and I giggle. Because if you wanted someone with sunshine coming out of their ass then you totally married the wrong person. And then I think about how annoyed you would be with someone who was happy and cheery 24/7 and I giggle again. Why do you say these silly things?
 
Dear Big A for the third time, when I asked you if we could win the lottery so we could make the kitchen bigger and you said to give you 5 years and we could do it, I wanted to smooch you. And when you said that it was definitely a priority BEFORE expanding the garage, I was flabbergasted. Does that mean that you actually get that the house is more of a priority than the house? Because then you went and talked to the electrician about rewiring the garage and added the house work as an afterthought...sooo...I'm confused.
 
Alright Lover Butts. That's all for today. The morning is going by quickly and I hope the rest of the day follows that lead.

1 comment:

  1. I am proud of you for working out and eating healthy! Virtual high five, haha! And as far as being paranoid about Mr. Fresh, I am the same way with our dog. And I hope your pool chairs are everything you are hoping they are. Enjoy some nice relaxing time on them.

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